Born:
Wairoa, Hawkes Bay, New Zealand during the 1950's. I was there but I
can't quite remember it.
Age:
40? (awesome what you can do with computers);
Education:
Kindergartens: (Werent invented);
Papanui Junction Primary School (out the back of Taihape): 1959-1965;
Tukemokihi Stn Primary School (Wairoa): 1966;
Te Aute College (Hawkes Bay): 1967-1971;
Took early retirement from College after the 1971 rugby season.
Me & Smithy 1958ish
Qualifications:
Not a hell of a lot on paper but if you have the time to sit down for
a yarn I'm sure I could come up with something that's believable.
Sports:
Rugby, Equestrian, Hunting, Fishing, Dog Trialing, Indoor Bowls, Golf.
(Taking the piss out Bureaucracy)
Jobs:
First ever job - cutting variegated thistles for $1 a day. Loved it;
Second job. Digging sheep shit out from under the woolshed. Enough said
about that!! *Refer Book #1 "Just a Job"
Shepherd;
Horse Breaker;
Farrier;
Shearer;
Fencer;
Scrub cutter;
Bulldozer Driver;
Truck Driver;
Drover;
Trout Culler (when the Ranger wasn't around I used to do this voluntarily
to keep the trout numbers at a manageable level);
P.R. Consultant. (Talked myself out of trouble on the odd occasion);
Vet? (When one of my dogs got ripped, had an accident or a horse needed
castrating, I did the job. Sometimes the neighbour needed a bit of advice
about their cat...but I dont think we need to go into that);
Labourer;
Demolition. (This is one area where I excelled, I was a natural. If
you want it broke I can do it);
Butcher;
Tree Feller;
Farm Manager;
Pourer of concrete;
Pest controller;
Barman;
Unemployed;
Prison Officer;
Writer of almost believable stuff.
Helping The Dept Of Conservation keep the trout numbers down while the Ranger is away chasing poachers !!
Favourite Food:
Roasted pig's head with all that nice crispy crackle, then what's left
over, eaten cold with baby spuds cut in half and fried in butter with
onions.
Least Favourite Food:
Rice in any shape, size or form. When I had to camp out, sometimes the
meat got fly blown. If I didn't want to go hungry I had a major problem.
The best way around this I found was to boil the bloody stuff and those
maggots would wriggle out in a real big hurry and make their way to the
top of the pot. You had to sit there with a small stick and keep flicking
the little buggers out until there were none left. To this day, every
time I see someone eating rice in any size, shape or form I swear I can
see the odd one or two of them little buggers move!
Favourite Singer;
Tony Joe White and his swamp music.
Favourite Group;
The Eagles
Likes:
Listening to the old people talk when they are in the mood. They've
been there and done that.
Dislikes:
People telling me what I like! You know the story, try this you'll
like it;
Hobbies:
Intelligent Fishing. (I wouldn't mind running into a dumb fish one day).
Most Embarrassing Moment:
One day in Wanganui I was walking around a car yard looking for a new
car when a cop came up and asked me what the hell I was doing? I was in
the Opera House Car Park;
Well the car yard was right next door and it only had a piddley little
chain fence separating them!!!
Aims and Goals:
To finish the novel I have started. It has sex, drugs, violence and
crooked politicians, but I need to do a little more research. As far as
the drugs and violence go, I sort of get a line on those at work, and
as far as the politician bit goes, all you have to do is watch the news.
That first subject is where I need to expand my horizons but my wife hasn't
quite come around to my way of thinking yet. But I'm working on it!
Quote:
"If bullshit was music you would be a whole brass band all on your own"
(That was my Uncle Paul; dont really know what he meant)??????
